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Archive for the 'Andrew Van "False Start"' Category

Amazing show this week. Evan talks gross drinks, Jason brings "Good" Game ideas for our 400th episode. We talk "Zombie Karen" video. We read craigslist missed connections, Evan found new words Jason can call his wife. Jason brings a clip from last week "REALLY?!!" And we close with the beauty that is Gary Busey on Cameo. 

00:30 - Intros

01:30 - Evan drinks something gross.

04:40 - Jason's "Great" new game ideas for our 400th episode. FYI Evan hates them.

12:50 - We watch the "Zombie Karen" video. And talk about mask vs no mask.

35:50 - Jason reads Craigslist Missed Connections from Alan Feuer's book "I Hope You Find Me."

45:00 - Evan brings a list of terms, Jason can call his new bride, from around the world.

56:00 - We relive an amazing clip from last week's episode "REALLY?!!" (Thank you Brian Reeder)

59:30 - Gary Busey is on Cameo, 'Nuff Said.

NOMINATE US HERE!! (for COMEDY) at the People's Choice Podcast Awards!!

https://www.podcastawards.com/app/signup/

Watch Zombie Karen Video HERE!!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0f1NngO6xeM

Buy Alan Feuer's book "I Hope You Find Me" HERE!!

https://www.amazon.com/Hope-You-Find-craigslists-Connections/dp/1683490223

And if you want to buy the Bearded Ones a Gary Busey Cameo, it's right HERE!!

https://www.cameo.com/garybusey

Listen to Evan's episode of "False Start: Fake Sports Real Shots" - TV DAD Bracket HERE!!

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/episode-67-best-tv-dads/id1455223970?i=1000482291137

 

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This week we recap Jason's virtual Bachelor Party Roast. (Thanks Andrew Van!) Evan talks "To Catch A Predator". We play another round of "Tom Cruise Movie Stunts Game!" and we close with "Gary Busey: Pet Judge!"

2:00 - Jason brought some clips from his virtual Bachelor Party Roast. Jokes on Jason, Evan, & The show too!

23:50 - Evan talks his favorite past moments of "To Catch a Predator" and brings a clip.

40:10 - We play another round of "The Tom Cruise Movie Stunts Game!" We randomly combine "Famous Locations" & "Action Objectives" and we have to create the stunt!! (Ex: "Space X Shuttle" & "Get the Vaccine") (We played it before on Ep: 357)

1:00:15 - We talk about "Gary Busey: Pet Judge" who can't get the show name right & we think Gary took the job just to get a free meal. 

Check out Andrew Van & Brandon Rainwater's Roast Battle Shows HERE & HERE!

Roast Show #1:

https://www.facebook.com/YesVandrew/videos/10220989846112400/

Roast Show #2:

https://www.facebook.com/YesVandrew/videos/10221070900298704/

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Where we start by asking for help getting nominated in the 2019 People's Choice Podcast Awards!! Go to https://www.podcastawards.com/ to register and nominate The Bearded Ones under People's Choice, Comedy, Entertainment and TV/Film and if you are feeling extra nice, The Lucky Ten Thousand in Education!! Then we start talking about how Evan may have a killer in his midst...a cute,small,furry one and we talk a lil Ted Bundy..cuz..why not? After that we play a round of The Google Movie Translate Game using patriotic movies this time! THEN we create a commercial for the new dating app Dabod!! After that we play The Movie Trend Game where we use trends in some movies to create sequals to others, we play The Google Translate Music Game Eminem Edition, we talk about a guy who is surprisingly happy working in a place most of us would avoid and we close with a serious subject... Jason's Pizza Box Suicide note. 

 

Check out Andrew Van and his podcast False Start here

 

and don't forget the podcast awards! Vote here

 

P.s.-Kids, if you listen..you see the way your cat is looking at you? DO YA????

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Where we celebrate the birthday of the legend Gary Busey by giving him a celebrity roast featuring Emperor Palpatine, Al Pacino, Tony Danza and Jesse Ventura! Then we make a musical out of his classic film Gingerdeadman, theorize on what conversations between Marvel and Mr Busey would be like if they asked him to be in their movies and feature 3 new Busey Juice Commercials! The man, the myth...The Buse. After that, we invent a dating app for guys with Dadbods, and we close with Spiderman-Far From Home predictions with the help of Sean from fellow Danger Entertainment podcast The Pittsburgh Nerd Podcast, Thanks guys! Also Ty Andrew Van for submitting roast jokes, check out his podcast, w/a recent episode featuring our own Jason Underwood, False Start, check him out!!

 

Nominate us under Peoples Choice, Comedy, Entertainment and TV/Film for the 2019 People's Choice Podcast awards at www.podcastawards.com

 

Listen to The Pittsburgh Nerd Podcast here

Check out The False Start Podcast here

..or any other podcast platforms they are on.

 

P.S.-Kids, if you listen, Gary Busey will kinda sorta refuse a role you offer to him but you aren't really sure what just happened.

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00:00 - Intro

02:30 - Evan & Jason predict the last episode of "Game of Thrones". Have we kept up with the show? No.

11:40 - Thanks Andrew Van for the shoutout. Check out his podcast "False Start: Fake Sports, Real Shots" Listen to him HERE - http://falsestartpodcast.libsyn.com/

12:30 - QUIZ GAME - Jason challenges Evan this time with Google Translated Metallica lyrics. It's up to Evan to guess the song!

21:45 - PITCH THAT SHOW! GAME - Bob Iger teased us with a 3rd Star Wars tv show, but didn't give any details. Jason and Evan randomly select criteria and based a BRAND NEW DISNEY+ STAR WARS SHOW around it. (Ex: A biographical show starring Admiral Akbar that takes place after "The Last Jedi".)

43:35 - Jason brings some clips! 1st one calls out Evan for not keeping up with the new shit kids like. and 2nd one is the Intro Song to a cop show we came up with last week "CARNIE JUSTICE!"

51:00 - BEARDED ONES BRACKET!! - In honor of the new season of Evan's other podcast The Lucky 10,000, Evan asks me the question, "Which Badass Woman from History would make the BEST Wingman?" 

HAPPY MEMORIAL DAY!

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Where we start with a shout out to Actress, Yoga Guru Regan Talleh!!! THEN we start the show proper with talk opening night mishaps, which leads to a production like you've never seen.... because you literally can't. THEN we talk Empire fashion, we shout out former guest Andrew Van's new podcast "False Start", talk bad cast parties, Jason has been obsessed with Marvel/DC counterpart characters so we play a game called "Comicbook Counterpart Characters" where we come up with more.

Evan talks about how even when you try to lose weight, when someone sees your stocky ass digging for food in your car NEVER looks good, We discover that Buffalo Bill has a side business all about body suits and we because Disney released more information about Galaxy's Edge we close with another round of "Amuse Me: Galaxy's Edge Edition" where we create new Star Wars amusement park rides!!

 

P.S.-Kids, if you listen, a hobo will ruin your vacation..or enhance it....

 

Check out Regan Talleh for your Yoga needs by emailing her @ Funnygirlyoga@gmail.com

 

Check out Andrew Vans podcast False Start here 

 

Check out the body suit video here

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Where we start with expressions of love to each other by exchanging gifts for Christmas. Then Evan shows his hatred for Jason by chastising him for negating all his verbal trickery from last week. THEN we talk about how stupid young people are for preferring the "Star Wars" Prequals to the Original Trilogy. THEN we talk "The Last Jedi" (Spoilers over at 45:13 mark)!!! After that we visit a cute little kitty who needs some love...and a GD face!! Chase No-Face is a miracle.

Then we get into the effects Bill "The Junk Man" Whaley has on DA LADEEZ... ok, well, one lady, Lori Bakker. Then we discuss the poor sucker who parkored right off the side of a 62 story building. THEN we close with a new game.... "In A Trailer!!!!" Where based on random actors and events, Jason and Evan must create a movie trailer.

See Chase No-Face Here!

P.S.-Kids, if you listen, you will get a visit in the middle of the night from a cat who wants to head butt you but doesn't have A DAMN FACE!!!!

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Where we start with being a cowboy (YES!)... on a steel horse we ride (YES!!!), plus an impromptu cameo from Miley herself!!!!. Welcome back Chainsaw. Welcome back. THEN Evan gives us the latest on his fraud situation. Quick sidebar... you keeping up with your wellness? Don't forgo that.... don't ever wells forgo. After that, we get a special visit from a long lost friend..... Bill "The Junkman" Whaley!!!! THEN we talk about how the Bullied Boys outreach may have backfired and close out with finishing the last round of one of our favorite games, "Would You F*ck It?!!"

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P.S.-Kids, if you listen, junk man will make all your Christmas gifts!

Watch The Junkman on The Jim Bakker Show part 1 HERE!

https://jimbakkershow.com/video/show-2022/

Watch The Junkman on The Jim Bakker Show part 2 HERE!

https://jimbakkershow.com/video/show-2023/

Keaton Jones Bully Video HERE

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kz1xzBYppW8

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Where we start with Part 1 of Jason's tales of Hawaii!!!! Then we have another TASTE TEST when he brings in some authentic Hawaiian snacks like... Pineapple Pretzels ...Spam Flavored Macadamia Nuts ...Sea Weed??...Why Hawaii...God why...

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After that, Evan gives us his OWN Part 2, namely what happened in the weird "Pulp Fiction-esque" follow-up with the girl who stood him up. THEN Evan brings some more childhood writings and other items and we close with a video showing either a guy realizing he just got caught for murder or the best actor in a generation...or both.....

P.S. - Kids...if you listen..... we will open that dumpster by god.

 

 

See the killer/actor video here!

 

(Stay tuned after the end song for two bonus outtakes!!!! Just like the Marvel end credit scenes!!!)

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Where we start with...THE FACT THAT WE ARE NOMINATED IN THE PODCAST AWARDS!!! TY!!!! Then we read a review. Thanks Chris of The Nerdbliss Podcast, (link below). And after that we get into the new intro Jason made (love it man, can't wait to use it...every week...) THEN Evan brings us "Hey There...Part 3: The Fingering". After that we hear the outtakes of a certain cannibal's most famous line, then Evan reveals some deep, dark family secrets; we realize you only need 3 things in life; Evan gets some head in a bathroom...admit it..you're not surprised... And we close with another edition of SUPERBEASTS!!!! 

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P.S.-Kids, if you listen....don't tell Jason that we're not using his intro.

 

Listen to the Nerdbliss Podcast here!

 

P.P.S. - Here's what Evan saw in the bathroom!!!

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Where we start with our first post 200th, post contest show with...a contest!! Featuring a song by our friends Valentine Wolfe, if you send us your best METAL MOMENT, and we pick it, you get a signed Valentine Wolfe CD!!! METAL!!!!!!

 

THEN we start the show with a text message communicating tragedy... oh and your girlfriend making out with some dude..maybe her brother....whatever. Then we get into Evans kinky heart attack, a proposal that makes us all uncomfortable...except for the chief..he loves love.... we talk about a drunk mother siting....and we finish strong with Jason reading from The Will he did at age 11 and a story he, his brother and his friend wrote together.

 

check out the proposal video here

 

and please check out Valentine Wolfe here

 

Email us your Metal Moment to beardedonespodcast@gmail.com or post to our facebook page here

 

P.S.-Kids, if you listen, you'll have to drag your mom home and she's not even done twerking!

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Where we do start with some election talk (we swear, it's light frothy and fun, but if you just can't take it, go to minute 28), then we talk about our live 200th show recording, our unfortunate new local "celebrity" and how he also does amazon reviews like Evan.... just more... killy. Then we mock Vin Diesel's new "XXX" movie. And Jason brings a NEW QUIZ in honor of VETERANS DAY!!

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And we close out with the sultry letters of President Warren G. Harding!

 

See Laughing Stock Improv's longform set at the New South Comedy Festival here !

 

P.S. - Kids...well we're all f*cked anyway, so just do what ya want.

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Happy Halloween Month!
Week 4

 

Where Jason and Evan decided to give Marmite a fair shake and eat it the CORRECT way. Results are…mixed. Then gooey Marmite reminds Evan of the 1988 horror movie remake, “The Blob” which leads to, “What if Marmite was a horror movie?”

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Then Evan talks about the British Horror show, “Dead Set”which is basically “Big Brother” + Zombies. We then discuss which American reality shows we would want to see mixed with the UNDEAD. Jason realizes he knows absolutely nothing about zombies. And we explore the benefits of having the zombie-inspired ability to control your severed appendages. And how they can…get you stuff.

Jason and Evan revisit last week’s topic of “Drunk Dialogue”and examine the results of their experiment.

Evan recounts his real paranormal experiences while rehearsing an Honest-to-God horror play. And then we realize that there’s nothing scarier than the jokes of a child. And something even MORE scary is that nice old man you would NEVER suspect. But you can’t blame him because you DID defile his state park!

And we close with another HALLOWEEN QUIZ! Evan blends impressions and famous horror movie quotes and Jason has to guess them, which leads to the most TERRIFYING game show called:

“Doc Brown Goes Back In Time to F***Your Mother, and It’s Up To You To Stop Him!”

 


LIVE 200th EPISODE TICKET INFO HERE!

https://www.eventbrite.com/e/stand-up-comedy-from-christian-rodriguez-baton-rouge-erich-laux-ann-arbor-marc-staudenmaier-tickets-28448432026

Coffee Underground (Greenville S.C.) November 4th 10:30pm set. We will be recording live after four awesome comedians, Christian Rodriguez, Erich Laux, Marc Staudenmaier, & L. Michelle! Come out for them, stay for us!!

P.S. - Kids, NSFW, if you listen, Doc Brown will invite you on his game show.

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Where we start with Jason's tales from the pool! And he learns that there's a fine line between a kid being a splashy dick and drowning.

 
Then we get into how apparently most Texans are gay, (hooray!!!), which leads us into a scene about a homophobe in the Star Wars Cantina.
Then Jason reads one of his old notebooks and regales us with his awesome ideas like:

- An "American Gladiators" style show..but with horses.
- A really awesome (patronizing) comedy..uh no wait...drama....no wait..gritty gangster movie...oh f*ck it, it's about losing your thumbs.
- And a new Comic Book idea about a guy with the worst power ever!
 
THEN we have a NEW BRACKET!! This time we ask the question:
"Which Comic Book Supervillian Would Make the Best Reality Talent Show Judge?"
 
Vote for us in comedy and Teddy and the Bassman in mature in the podcast awards here

AND in the Best of the Upstate (voting starts Monday june 6th) Here

P.S  -Kids, don't listen, but vote like hell!!!

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Episode 150!!
Where we start with a plug for Evans first audio-book, "The First Door", then we review the end of The Beard "Wars" with Salty Language Podcast. Clemson football being #1 in the country leads to us hearing a really, really honest football heckler. And because of the holidays Evan and Jason try to come up with a "Reverse Parent Trap" movie about kids trying to split up their parents so they can get 2 Christmases.

Then Jason reads a brilliant (terrible) story he wrote back in his early teens. After that, Evan goes over another Ren. Faire Adventure which leads to how certain people talk to kids and, well, just...just don't do it....

We then close out the show with medieval torture devices that leads us to a NEW GAME SHOW hosted by Louie Anderson and finally Jason tricks Evan into making one of the biggest geek mistakes with Star Wars Mad Libs, featuring Emperor Palpys audio diary!!!

P.S.-Kids, if you listen, we've got a great game show for ya!!!

Check out Evans Audiobook HERE!!
Check out Salty Language Podcast HERE!!
http://www.saltylanguage.com/
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