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Archive for the 'Terrifying True Stories' Category

Where we start with expressions of love to each other by exchanging gifts for Christmas. Then Evan shows his hatred for Jason by chastising him for negating all his verbal trickery from last week. THEN we talk about how stupid young people are for preferring the "Star Wars" Prequals to the Original Trilogy. THEN we talk "The Last Jedi" (Spoilers over at 45:13 mark)!!! After that we visit a cute little kitty who needs some love...and a GD face!! Chase No-Face is a miracle.

Then we get into the effects Bill "The Junk Man" Whaley has on DA LADEEZ... ok, well, one lady, Lori Bakker. Then we discuss the poor sucker who parkored right off the side of a 62 story building. THEN we close with a new game.... "In A Trailer!!!!" Where based on random actors and events, Jason and Evan must create a movie trailer.

See Chase No-Face Here!

P.S.-Kids, if you listen, you will get a visit in the middle of the night from a cat who wants to head butt you but doesn't have A DAMN FACE!!!!

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Where we start with being a cowboy (YES!)... on a steel horse we ride (YES!!!), plus an impromptu cameo from Miley herself!!!!. Welcome back Chainsaw. Welcome back. THEN Evan gives us the latest on his fraud situation. Quick sidebar... you keeping up with your wellness? Don't forgo that.... don't ever wells forgo. After that, we get a special visit from a long lost friend..... Bill "The Junkman" Whaley!!!! THEN we talk about how the Bullied Boys outreach may have backfired and close out with finishing the last round of one of our favorite games, "Would You F*ck It?!!"

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P.S.-Kids, if you listen, junk man will make all your Christmas gifts!

Watch The Junkman on The Jim Bakker Show part 1 HERE!

https://jimbakkershow.com/video/show-2022/

Watch The Junkman on The Jim Bakker Show part 2 HERE!

https://jimbakkershow.com/video/show-2023/

Keaton Jones Bully Video HERE

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kz1xzBYppW8

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Where we start with Part 1 of Jason's tales of Hawaii!!!! Then we have another TASTE TEST when he brings in some authentic Hawaiian snacks like... Pineapple Pretzels ...Spam Flavored Macadamia Nuts ...Sea Weed??...Why Hawaii...God why...

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After that, Evan gives us his OWN Part 2, namely what happened in the weird "Pulp Fiction-esque" follow-up with the girl who stood him up. THEN Evan brings some more childhood writings and other items and we close with a video showing either a guy realizing he just got caught for murder or the best actor in a generation...or both.....

P.S. - Kids...if you listen..... we will open that dumpster by god.

 

 

See the killer/actor video here!

 

(Stay tuned after the end song for two bonus outtakes!!!! Just like the Marvel end credit scenes!!!)

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Where we start with...THE FACT THAT WE ARE NOMINATED IN THE PODCAST AWARDS!!! TY!!!! Then we read a review. Thanks Chris of The Nerdbliss Podcast, (link below). And after that we get into the new intro Jason made (love it man, can't wait to use it...every week...) THEN Evan brings us "Hey There...Part 3: The Fingering". After that we hear the outtakes of a certain cannibal's most famous line, then Evan reveals some deep, dark family secrets; we realize you only need 3 things in life; Evan gets some head in a bathroom...admit it..you're not surprised... And we close with another edition of SUPERBEASTS!!!! 

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P.S.-Kids, if you listen....don't tell Jason that we're not using his intro.

 

Listen to the Nerdbliss Podcast here!

 

P.P.S. - Here's what Evan saw in the bathroom!!!

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Where we start with our first post 200th, post contest show with...a contest!! Featuring a song by our friends Valentine Wolfe, if you send us your best METAL MOMENT, and we pick it, you get a signed Valentine Wolfe CD!!! METAL!!!!!!

 

THEN we start the show with a text message communicating tragedy... oh and your girlfriend making out with some dude..maybe her brother....whatever. Then we get into Evans kinky heart attack, a proposal that makes us all uncomfortable...except for the chief..he loves love.... we talk about a drunk mother siting....and we finish strong with Jason reading from The Will he did at age 11 and a story he, his brother and his friend wrote together.

 

check out the proposal video here

 

and please check out Valentine Wolfe here

 

Email us your Metal Moment to beardedonespodcast@gmail.com or post to our facebook page here

 

P.S.-Kids, if you listen, you'll have to drag your mom home and she's not even done twerking!

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Where we do start with some election talk (we swear, it's light frothy and fun, but if you just can't take it, go to minute 28), then we talk about our live 200th show recording, our unfortunate new local "celebrity" and how he also does amazon reviews like Evan.... just more... killy. Then we mock Vin Diesel's new "XXX" movie. And Jason brings a NEW QUIZ in honor of VETERANS DAY!!

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And we close out with the sultry letters of President Warren G. Harding!

 

See Laughing Stock Improv's longform set at the New South Comedy Festival here !

 

P.S. - Kids...well we're all f*cked anyway, so just do what ya want.

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Happy Halloween Month!
Week 4

 

Where Jason and Evan decided to give Marmite a fair shake and eat it the CORRECT way. Results are…mixed. Then gooey Marmite reminds Evan of the 1988 horror movie remake, “The Blob” which leads to, “What if Marmite was a horror movie?”

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Then Evan talks about the British Horror show, “Dead Set”which is basically “Big Brother” + Zombies. We then discuss which American reality shows we would want to see mixed with the UNDEAD. Jason realizes he knows absolutely nothing about zombies. And we explore the benefits of having the zombie-inspired ability to control your severed appendages. And how they can…get you stuff.

Jason and Evan revisit last week’s topic of “Drunk Dialogue”and examine the results of their experiment.

Evan recounts his real paranormal experiences while rehearsing an Honest-to-God horror play. And then we realize that there’s nothing scarier than the jokes of a child. And something even MORE scary is that nice old man you would NEVER suspect. But you can’t blame him because you DID defile his state park!

And we close with another HALLOWEEN QUIZ! Evan blends impressions and famous horror movie quotes and Jason has to guess them, which leads to the most TERRIFYING game show called:

“Doc Brown Goes Back In Time to F***Your Mother, and It’s Up To You To Stop Him!”

 


LIVE 200th EPISODE TICKET INFO HERE!

https://www.eventbrite.com/e/stand-up-comedy-from-christian-rodriguez-baton-rouge-erich-laux-ann-arbor-marc-staudenmaier-tickets-28448432026

Coffee Underground (Greenville S.C.) November 4th 10:30pm set. We will be recording live after four awesome comedians, Christian Rodriguez, Erich Laux, Marc Staudenmaier, & L. Michelle! Come out for them, stay for us!!

P.S. - Kids, NSFW, if you listen, Doc Brown will invite you on his game show.

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Where we start with Jason's tales from the pool! And he learns that there's a fine line between a kid being a splashy dick and drowning.

 
Then we get into how apparently most Texans are gay, (hooray!!!), which leads us into a scene about a homophobe in the Star Wars Cantina.
Then Jason reads one of his old notebooks and regales us with his awesome ideas like:

- An "American Gladiators" style show..but with horses.
- A really awesome (patronizing) comedy..uh no wait...drama....no wait..gritty gangster movie...oh f*ck it, it's about losing your thumbs.
- And a new Comic Book idea about a guy with the worst power ever!
 
THEN we have a NEW BRACKET!! This time we ask the question:
"Which Comic Book Supervillian Would Make the Best Reality Talent Show Judge?"
 
Vote for us in comedy and Teddy and the Bassman in mature in the podcast awards here

AND in the Best of the Upstate (voting starts Monday june 6th) Here

P.S  -Kids, don't listen, but vote like hell!!!
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Episode 150!!
Where we start with a plug for Evans first audio-book, "The First Door", then we review the end of The Beard "Wars" with Salty Language Podcast. Clemson football being #1 in the country leads to us hearing a really, really honest football heckler. And because of the holidays Evan and Jason try to come up with a "Reverse Parent Trap" movie about kids trying to split up their parents so they can get 2 Christmases.

Then Jason reads a brilliant (terrible) story he wrote back in his early teens. After that, Evan goes over another Ren. Faire Adventure which leads to how certain people talk to kids and, well, just...just don't do it....

We then close out the show with medieval torture devices that leads us to a NEW GAME SHOW hosted by Louie Anderson and finally Jason tricks Evan into making one of the biggest geek mistakes with Star Wars Mad Libs, featuring Emperor Palpys audio diary!!!

P.S.-Kids, if you listen, we've got a great game show for ya!!!

Check out Evans Audiobook HERE!!
Check out Salty Language Podcast HERE!!
http://www.saltylanguage.com/
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We continue our month of creeps and crawls with more of Evans short movie reviews, then Jason leads us in another round of the new quiz game that's sweeping the nation, "I Play a Clip From a Horror Movie and You Tell Me What Horror Movie That Clip is From!!" (See if I stump Evan) Then Jason tells of some real creepy goings-on... well, sort of.... Ok, we don't actually know.... Then Evan shares a video about....ROOMS.....scary.... then we get into another edition of Evans Amazon Reviews, plus so much more!!!

P.S.-kids....the calls are coming from inside the house!
Hidden Rooms Video (courtesy of Mr Nightmare!!!)
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